Shit I Think About !

Hey hey hey all my thirteen fans hope your all bloody great !


So yeah couldn`t really think of a name for this blog as I dont actually have any certain topic to blog about just thought I would type whatever has been on my mind recently. :)


Tell ya what its nearly the end of winter here and fuck me im fucking excited ! Winter here is fucking dark and depressing and just plain shithouse ! People always tell me yeah well dont just complain get out there and go skiing and stuff , I did that , I went Snowboarding twice and I sucked balls ! I had done it once before in Australia (yes we have snow too haha) but that was 16 years ago and I had no fear and it turns out a much better sense of balance back then. Yes it was still fun and for sure im looking forwards to it next year but the point is its gunna take me a while to get good and another point is ITS STILL FUCKING COLD OUTSIDE !!! I come from Brisbane , sometimes it gets to 30 degrees CELCIUS in the WINTER !! Im just not used to not only being in such god damn cold weather (-20 celcuis) but also being inside so much, it sucks so much camel balls. I almost never used to watch movies or anything now I have seen nearly all of Netflix. Here is a random kinda nasty meme about Netflix haha :P Hey he deserves it ... probably ... ;)

 Back home we would always go to the park or have a BBQ or I would drive to the mountains and do a bushwalk, In fact every week I would always do a bushwalk even if it was just around the city (there was a sweet mini forest near where I used to live with my sister Teagan). Anyways dont wanna complain to much or I will seem like a dick but fuck man winter is fucked... like real fucked. What probably makes it also even worse is how good summer is here ! Sun, BBQ , swimming in the fjords and amazing sunsets at 11:30pm ! You would find a harder place to beat in the summer than Oslo when its 30 degrees and sunny and the fjords are warm. Bloody epdawg it is ! This following Picture is a sillhouette of Sara standing in the sunset at 11pm in summer in Oslo 11pm !!!!

What else is going Down?? The American election, or at least the election before the election whatever the fuck is up with that .... so far I (and many others) have come to the conclusion that  Donald Trump is the shittest cunt I have ever seen in my life, he is ugly, he is stupid , he is recist, he is sexist, he is a hypocrite and worst of all he is a MEGA CAPITALIST. Which is the LAST thing the world needs right now! The main reason for many if not ALL of the environmental, economic and social problems the world faces these days is a DIRCECT result of capitalism. This other guy Bernie Sanders looks really great and seems to have great policies including free healthcare and education for all and actually taxing the shit out of all these billionares who basically pay zero tax whilst the rest of us pay heaps and slave our whole lives to make these handfull of people all the money. You may wonder why I am almost referring to America like I live there but these days they are literally the world police and I live in the world and I would like to see the police I like ruling the world. Not that people need to rule the world but this is the shituation we find ourselves in these days. Either way Sara and I are going to America in June for her 30th birthday so I wont go on to much about the American government because I literally think there is a super small possibility that I could get in some trouble over there. I know how the NSA works thanks to Edward Snowden and now that I have only mentioned his name here it would probably come up on their list of material which needs closer analysing. Yeah I may sounds crazy but hey read a book about Edward Snowden and how .... ok I have said enough haha. We are goin to New York for five nights and I cant bloody wait ! We even booked tickets to see the New York Yankees which im pretty stoked about, not so stoked about going to see The Lion King on Broadway or some drag show she wants to go to also but I know it will make Sara happy so i suppose its worth it haha :P. This NeXT meme of Donald Trump sums up how I feel about him.... just FUCK !

Next topic, the world , the more I seem to learn about whats going on with the world the more depressed I get about it. Sometimes I wish I was just ignorant and had my head in the sand like many others pretending that there is no problems. But I cant do that, there is an endless amount of problems going down with the world RIGHT NOW, such as climate change, extremely bad economic systems which eventually will lead to the collapse of the worlds economy, the introduction of more and more robots into the workplace which in turn will lead to hundreds of millions of people being out of work IN OUR LIFETIME. All those Things and I havent even mentioned all the wars or the real reasons they are happening because what they (the government) tell you is far from true. Anyways I see now this blog is turning into more of a book or newspaper article (for those to young to know what a newspaper is Google it haha) so i will sign off and wish you all a fucking rad day ! Cheers for reading will be back again soon !


That is all , Peace out , Catch ;)

HOLY TARANTULA VAGINAS IM BACK !

Well, Hey Hey Hey thats right Your favourite Australian from Oslo who blogs and also has Evan as his middle name and one time had to go to the hospital to get sand removed from his eye is back ! With AVENGENCE ! (Think thats how u spell it, got no spell check on Saras Norwegian computer, well there probly is but i dont know how to work it haha, moving right along though). So yeah been like 7 or so months since I have blogged and im sorry about that. My need for blogging comes and goes but hopefully this time it will stick, like heroin addiction ! ;)

So whats news in my life?? (I would ask you whats goin on in your life but nobody ever bloody comments on my blogs so I assume there is no need for me to be asking) Well Sara and I got married for the second time haha, we have already had a wedding a couple of years ago but that was basically for my visa so they wouldnt send me back home to Australia, which actually wouldnt have been so bad really considering a week or so ago here in Oslo it was fucking -20 degrees !!! MINUS FUCKING 20! We also bought and apartment here in Oslo in November ( I think thats when we moved in lol) so we are both bloody happy about that ! We managed to get a really good price because a mate of mine was actually selling the property ;) Oh Yeah ! Giddy up indeed !!! Other than the wedding and the apartment buying just kinda been doing the usual shit, travelling, drinking beers, hanging out with friends, oh I got a free snowboard but thats for another post, and other than that just getting older, uglier and wiser ! ;)

So i figured I would get back into blogging by telling u guys a bit about my wedding ! It was really fucking EPDAWG ! (for those that are new to my blog epdawg is a word me and my friend Rob made up, its a combination between epic and dawg if you didnt figure that one out for yourself) We actually got married in Thailand on Koh Samui island where we first met nearly five years ago now. It was great, we came in on a motherflippin elephant and the wedding was on the beach which was great ! I had shorts and no shoes on so i was happy as fuck haha ! So yeah the wedding was great, the sunset was great, the speeches were bloody great (mine of course being oscare worthy) the whole evening was just bloody awesome ! I will show ya a few photos now and give a little explanation for all of them ! :)

Ok so this first one is of us arriving at the venue at the beach on our bloody elephatnt ! How freaken epic does it look hey, you know why it looks epic? Beacause it really was ! First and possibly last time I will ever go on an elephant ! :)

This second photo is of us holding the wedding certificate, and I must say we both look pretty damn hot if I do say so myself haha :P

This next photo is of us walking back down the isle as a married couple, there was bloody heaps of flower petals getting thrown around, was really nice though ! :)

This next shot is just of the wedding party on the beach in the shape of a heart, oh its so nice and romantic isnt it ;) One of the best things about getting married in Thailand on the island we first met was that everybody says oh thats so nice and romantic, and it kinda is, the best part is that I didnt actually have to do anything to be romantic haha, just get married in a bloody great country with great people ! :)

This next one is of Sara and her two bridesmaids, doesnt she look beautiful, of course because I wouldnt settle for anything less! She looked beautiful and i knew she would, best thing about Sara is that she is that beatiful on the inside too ! (Its corny but its true haha)

This is just one of the 345,000 photos we took with the professional photographer on the beach after the wedding, just look at that god damn sunset, you can also make out a few more islands off in the distance, god damn epic place to get married ! We were just lucky there was no rain because in the days before the wedding there usually was a tropical storm about the time the wedding was supposed to start so we were lucky with that ! :)

This next photo is just of (from left to right). My best man Johan , my dad Keith, me of course (without me bloody beard mind you !!) and Johans mate Robin (yes thats a mans name in Scandanavia). This was early in the night so we werent to drunk yet, many many people got pretty smashed haha, I wont name names but they know who they are and to be honest it just added to the atmosphere and who whole evening! ;) EPDAWG INDEED !

Last of all this is a photo of Sara and I just as we finished our wedding dance (which we took three dance classes to learn and im happy to say we pretty much smashed it) We even ended with a kiss at the exact time the fireworks went off ! How bloody epic is that ! :)

We also did heaps of other cool shit while we were in Thailand and honeymooning in Cambodia, not least eating scorpions and tarantulas (vaginas and all). So next blog I will tell you guys a bit more about what we got up to for the rest of the trip cause god damn its epic in that part of the world, when you can get a draught beer for $0.50 on the beach in a cold glass you really cant loose can you haha, until then keep it real, glad to be back and I hope you guys ( the 5 People who read my blog) are happy too ! I will DEFINITELY keep it up more often this time !

That is all, Peace out, Catch ;)