Just passed 2000 views !! :) :) Cheers mofo's ! :D

Hey hey hey my legions of fans I hope ur all doing ok ... not good, not bad , just ok ;)

Anyways as the title states I just passed 2000 page views and I reckon that's pretty cool :) . Thanks to all the people who have helped me by looking at the blog it really gives me heaps of motivation to keep it up ! :) Even now as I have been resigned to blogging on my phone as my laptop is dead from to many viruses and just yesterday as I was trying to watch a stream of a rugby game on my girlfriends laptop I managed to download a virus which has actually taken over the whole computer and wont even let it turn on :( god dammit lol .

Sometimes I check out where ppl are looking at my blog come from and it really surprised me to see how my blog is slowly spreading around the world like a 16th century plague and eventually it will become so popular that I can take over the world and become the supreme leader and put an end to all the reality shows in the world and the people who are in them and anyone minutely related to them will be forced to fight in a gladiator style arena to the death against wild animals and the deadliest animal in the universe .... THE ZOMBIE CROCODILES !!!!  Zombie crocodiles are something that I made up recently when I was bored at work and decided to send some of my mates some super random msgs just for entertainment lol ... and recently I have invented the zombie crocodiles and the ACROCALYPSE that will be what happens when the zombie crocodiles arrive and unleash their untold wrath upon the universe .... this is what I send ppl sometimes ....  THE ZOMBIE CROCODILES ARE COMING !! ITS THE ACROCALYPSE !!! THE MOTHERFUCKING ACROCALYPSE !!! EVERYBODY GET DOWN !! I REPEAT GET DOWN OR THEY WILL EAT YOU .... ACROCALYPSE !!!!!

Ok so I seemed to stray away from the point a bit there lol ... but as I was saying I get surprised as to where my blog is getting views around the world ... the main countries that I get views from are the obvious ones such as : Norway,  Australia , Sweden and America for some reason ... other places that surprised me that they checked out me blog where Russia where I have more than a few views and also Latvia where I don't even know anyone ... also random places like Angola in Africa and Japan and even Turkey ... crazy but awesome shit right there ... to think ppl in Africa have read some random shit that I wrote and posted up is just mind boggling and makes me happy and proud :)

Not really sure about what else to say except a big thanks to all who read my insane ramblings on here and I hope I can continue to entertain you ... well im gunna try anyways ;) Hello to everyone around the world and I hope you have a good time wherever u are and whatever u are doing ... wether u are smoking a bucket bong in a garage in Ipswich or writing a thesis on the science of human flatulence, may you be able to achieve all ur dreams in your related field ;)

That is all , Peace out , Catch

Figured id reward u all with some pictures ... one is me in a dress and the othere is a guy with an awesome beard ;)    ... not sure if this is really a reward or more a punishment but hey whats done is done ;) cheers again ya'll :) catch

Do I miss Australia ??? .....bloody fucken oath I do !!! ;)

Hey hey hey all my drongo mates out there tuckin into a tinnie of VB and a snag on the barbie how the fuck are ya ! ?? ;)

Ok so as you all know im Australian and im living in Oslo .... ( hence the name of the blog ) anyways people always ask me if I miss Australia and of course I do ....there are approximately at least 463,973 reasons why I miss Australia ...possibly more anyways I figured I would tell you all a little bit about Australia and how fucken awesome it is ;) :P

First of all IT HAS FUCKING EVERYTHING ! Like literally , beach , snow , mountains , rainforest , desert , The Great Barrier Reef , and most importantly the best kind of people in the world ....now I know thats a pretty big call but have you ever met an Australian who is a dick head ....ok maybe some are but seriously %90 of people are all super mega awesome and friendly and funny and of course really really attractive ;) One of the reasons why it has so many different things is because its so god damn big ! Its just a bit smaller than the whole of Europe ... pretty sure if you took away France then Australia would be as big as the whole of Europe ....ok yes a shitload of Australia is covered by desert and semi arid grassland kinda shit but thats somehow the beauty of it ... when you drive along a road in the outback and the next town is 450 klms away you just get a real sense of adventure and somehow learn to appreciate how big this world really is that we live in and how small in the grand scheme of things that one person is ....

So of course I miss my friends shitloads , the main people I miss are as follows . Jacko Franks . Tamara Condotta . Robbie Barclay . Jason Tinto . Grazza Dunkley . Winno Gavriel . and my lil sister Teags Skelton Of course there are many more ppl that I miss but holy shitballs I miss these people the most ....what I would give to have all these people in the same place at the same time for about 48 hours of heavy drinking and partying ....I would literally pay $1000 for that to happen ;) I also miss my family , and I come from a big family ... like fucking huge ass haha ....ok so I have 2 sisters , 1 half bro , 5 step sisters and 2 step brothers and im the oldest ( and of course smartest and most best looking ) of them all ;). This is just my immediate family as on both sides my family is huge , mainly on my dads side and I would say I have over 50 cousins and probably more , the great thing is we generally all get along really well ....because we are all awesome I suppose that would help ;)

The beach ( mainly a place called Pottsville ) Me and one of my best mates Jacko used to meet up at a place called Pottsville and go camping for the weekend , Pottsville is a small beach town around 1.45 hours drive from Brisbane and we meet there at the usual spot and set up camp , start fishing , start a fire,  have a smoke , have a beer and crank some music and laugh and talk absolute shit for hours on end ....or until someone ends up falling down the sandy cliff into the water haha ( Im yet to do it haha ) Either way this palce is amazing because you camp on the river on one side and then you walk across the road which is about 50m away and then you walk for another 100m and your on the beach ....and the beach is so good ....the waves are usually pretty awesome and for the most part there is never to many people on the beach because Pottsville is just a small beach town ( maybe about 3000 people or so ) . I miss waking up before everyone and having a "smoke" and a beer at 5am in the morning and getting stuck into some serious fishin in the river whilst everyone is sleeping off their hangovers ...of course I have a hangover but I just fix it by having another beer ;) Fishing is always best really early in the morning also so thats a main reason I get up so early ...and the fact that we arent supposed to camp where we do and the rangers sometimes come and check , but if im fishing then we arent camping ....we are fishing ;) :P I also miss driving down the coast with my other best mate Robbie , we usually randomly decide to hit up the beach and go for a bodyboard , which I love and miss terribly , its a sport I can actually do nowdays because it doesnt require any heavy impact on my super fucked up knee ( my knee is rooted... 2 snapped ligaments and post traumatic damage in the miniscus ) .

                    Our camp at Pottsville ...beyond the tent about 50m is the beach !!! ;) :)

The people are one of the things I miss also ....ppl are just so friendly and you make friends nearly anywhere you go ... meet someone outside having a smoke at a pub and then you talk for a while and then invite them to come and sit with your table to drink piss and talk shit and then youve got a friend for life haha ....thats how many friendships and probably relationships would have started in Australia ;)

I miss the outdoors ....around Brisbane we have many natural wonders , such as The Glasshouse Mountains , Springbrook National Park , Connondale National Park , D`aguilar Nastional Park , and Moreton Island , these parks are ALL within 2 hours driving from the centre of Brisbane ( with the exception of  Moreton Island because you get a ferry from there but would take only around 3 hours from the Brisbane CBD ) I have been bushwalking in all of these parks on many different occasions and I love to be in nature and climbing mountains ( not huge ones just pretty big ones ) After work usually about once or twice a week I would jump in my ute and drive the 45mins to a moutain called Mt Ngungun which I think is only about 600m high but is pretty steep in some areas and takes about 1.5 hours to get up and down if you hurry ...usually about 2 hours if your taking it easy .

        Climbing a mountain in the Glasshouse mountains called Mt Tibrogargan ...its fucken steep haha

Mt Tibrogargan ....you beat me the first time but I conquered you the second time ! ;)

Ok so yes I miss many things about Aus but thats not to say that I dont like living here in Norway ....its just a bit different as you could imagine ... either way im not going anywhere because my girl is here and im always gunna be where ever she may be :) .... hopefully at the end of next year we are moving back to Aus for a couple of years ;) :) Fingers crossed ay ;)

That is all , Peace out , Catch

                          The sunrise over the beach at Pottsville ....amazingly awesome ;) :)

Having a blog is like having a baby .... ;) :)

Hey hey hey my friends who are using the intraweb for entertaining your soul ....I hope I can help with the entertaining bit ... at least I can try my hardest and my mum always said thats good enough , so thats good enough for me ;)

Having a blog is almost like having a baby .... it starts off small and has 2 parents ( me and the internet ) and its all cute and small and innocent at first and then it gets older and wiser and nastier real quick :P , you feed them they grow , they meet more people, they make new friends ;) Only difference really is that one is make beleive and purely a figment of my imagination and the other is a harsh reality followed by massive personal, financial and emotional responsibilities ;) ... think im just gunna start 2 other blogs instead of having the 3 kids that I want ... I can have a blog family and when I turn 40 and have done this for 15 years I can shoot myself in the realisation that the blogs really are stupid ( sort of anyways ) and that I missed my opportunity to procreate in this world and that I actually missed the whole point of living because I was so caught up with my 3 blog babies .....ok this is really starting to get out of control im gunna start a new paragraph :P

You know what I really hate , well apparently many things according to some of my close friends and girlfriend , and family haha , but I just tend to refer to it as constructive criticism of the world in which we live ....I mean so much stupid shit happens all day everyday and I just happen to be the person who decides to point it out and make stupid remarks about it ....anyways here is a list of 5 things that I hate , in no particular order or level of hate

1: GEORDIE SHORE : This is whats wrong with the world , watch a full eposide of this vile creation and you will feel like vommiting and shitting and pissing at the same time just to rid your body of any of the bullshitnastyness that exudes from this terrible terrible show .

2: INSTAGRAM : Seriously wat the fuck is the go with this shit ...you can post photos on facebook !  oh but whats that ...you can choose from 72 different filters to make your ugly face seem some kind of good ....it still dont work ....you simply just look ugly in a different filter . One thing that is advantageous of this stupid revelation in social media is that it means that people are not posting pictures of their dinner AS often ...they still do of course , but since the revelation of INSTAGAY there has been at least %23.79 less photos of peoples stupid dinner on facebook. ;)

3: PEOPLE WITH BABIES ON FACEBOOK : Seriously, yes I saw you have a kid , NO I dont need to see a new picture of it every 3 or 4 hours cause it looks ugly and has a weird shaped head and its not just me that thinks that because I saw you captioned it " such a cute little girl " but in the comments nobody mentioned the word cute , they said congrats , yay , nice pic and so on but no cute ... if I had an ugly baby I would keep it in the washing machine and only take it out when clothes are dirty and feed it leftover dog food that the dog doesnt eat. ( Note this is not true in any way ! :P )

4: TECHNOLOGY: What the fuck is the go with people going out to dinner and both of them are on their stupid phones scrolling throught pages and pages of stupid useless information that just clogs their brain up with shit and takes away from the actualy experience of being a human , which is massivly built around dealing with other people in the community and learning how to interpret different social situations and correct ways to act etc. Just wait till you get home in 2 hours and then check facebook ....NOTHING WILL HAPPEN !!!!

5: OLD PEOPLE : Ok I know this is a bit harsh and also slightly hypocritical seeing as though im hoping to be one of these one day ...but until I pass 60 im not considered annoyingly old ....ok where to start .... do they practice getting in the road and walking slow or does this talent just come from years and years of walking and then just giving up and thinking ....FUCK I dont give a fuck anymore im not concentrating when I walk and if people get annoyed I dont give a fuck because im old and they cant punch an old person because thats just not cool . They smell funny , come on they do ...some of them may look cute but oh dear god do they emit a nausingliatingly strong odour of musk/old smell , im not sure but im guessing that deoderant and personal hygine hadnt taken effect in society before these people got old so im giving them the benifit of the doubt on this one ...but after 2040 if your old and you smell funny im going to walk up to you and say politely " excuse me sir/madam but you smell like a homeless person who hasnt showered in 79 days and has been sleeping in a rubbish bin full of hospital waste next to the hospital " and maybe im hoping that would be enough to shock them into conforming with the rest of the civilised world and just do one thing and thats spray a bit of deoderant before you go out venturing ;) I also dont like them because they remind me of mortality and make me think about the fact that , yeah your young now , but your turning 30 soon and then theres 40 next and then 50 and then your fucked . If there were no old people walking around then I wouldnt think about the fact that one day I will die I would just carry on wasting away my life in blissfull harmony writing blogs to about 20 people and complaining about things that most people like ....fuck I think im already getting old ! ;)

Anyways thats about all for today maybe tomoroww I willl write a list of the top 5 things that I really love ...or maybe I might write a list of the 5 best balconies of any house/apartment I have ever lived in and how good their views were and other certain funtionalities of the balcony . Ok im out ;)

That is all , Peace out , Catch ;)

Bungy Jumping , Skydiving , Swimming with Great Whites , Eating an Apple ... I`ve done a few cool things ;)

Hey hey hey all my intraweb pals hope your all good in da hood yo :P ;) Sara thinks I talk to much like a ganster sometimes ....I just remind her that I need to keep up my ghetto respect otherwise someone gunna come and cap me in da ass anytime now ! :P

Ok so yeah Ì`ve done a few cool things in my time and these four things I mentioned in the title of the post are the coolest ....especially that one time when I ate that apple .....that was fucking EPIC to say the least !!!

So the first thing I did of these was the bungy jumping, which I did with one of my best mates Rob when we were in New Zealand and it was my first time overseas and I was about 21 :) We travelled to Queenstown in the South island and as you may know Queestown is an adrenaline junkies heaven ( not that im really that but a little bit haha ) Anyways they have skiiing in the winter and Bungy jumping , skydiving and white water rafting in the summer . We were there in the summer and we decided to do the biggest bungy jump they had , which is the 134m high Nevis one and suspended from a cable car which is strung out between two mountains in a big gorge with a river below it ...I asked the guy what happens if you touch the water and he just said ....you don`t want that and laughed haha ...ok I thought ....anyways you get in this small cable car thing and make your way out to the pod in the middle from where you jump and fuck me this was pretty damn scary just the cable car out there. Then they ask you to sit up on a bench in the pod and its made out of very hard plastic so you can see through it , I said to the guy do I really have to sit there and he said yes so I inched my way onto the seat and got my bungy strapped on and then I was ready to go .... They say to you just look at the tree on the other side of that mountain and dive out ....so thats what I did haha ...its an unbeleivable feeling that you get ...I would say its the closest feeling you can come to that your dying without actually dying because your body is just thinking no this cant be happening we cant fly ....WE ARE GOING TO DIE !!! But after you feel the bungy chord take your weight its all ok and you can just enjoy the trip ! We loved it that much that as soon as we got off the bus we went and booked another jump that afternoon at the top of a mountain right on Queenstown and the view was amazing but this one was only 49m and was situated off a big arm like platform which hung out over the top of the mountain and this time you could actually run and jump off the edge instead of having to jump the normal way ....  it was also amazing although not nearly as frightening ;) I actually put this up on youtube to show friends and faimly so if you wanna check it out here is the link :) The first one is the biggest one from the 2 of them and it was just freaken awesome !! :) Here is where you can find it :) Note ....I had NO say in the choice of music on and of these videos haha :P

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIGN_yzv6nA

This next one is the second bungy jump that me and my mate Rob did and it was on top of a mountain overlooking Queenstown and the view was just amazing as you can see from the video :) So much fun !! :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oJuP3LXeNjE

I have also done skydiving with my mate Luke in Redcliffe , Queensland and it was also fucking awesome ;) We jumped from 14,000 ft I think and it was so much fun ...expensive ( about 500 bucks but well worth it all ) Here is where you can findn the video of that :) ... I remember the guy telling me in the plane ..." right we are all hooked on and ready to go " I just felt like saying man are you sure ....DID YOU DOUBLE CHECK EVERYTHING !!! But i just trusted him and of course it was all good ;) As we are about to go out the guy is like look at the camera and I was j ust thinking just fucking jump man fuck the camera fuck everything lets go haha ! The whole thing was amazing and the peace and quiet that comes when you open the parachute is amazing ....you float around like a bird and its so quiet and peacefull and cool ...and the view of  course is damn good :) . Here is where you can find the link for the jump  :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqN69W84mJQ

I have also done diving in a cage with great white sharks in a place called Port Lincoln , Sth Australia, and it was just as good as these 2 other things ...I wrote a previous post about the shark diving so if you wanna know how that was you should check it out ! :) :) Cheers all . And I encourage ALL of you to do all of these things !! :D

That is all , Peace out , Catch


          A picture from the shark dive ....taken by either me or Sara when we were in the cage ! :)

Music !!!! HOW FUCKING AWESOME IS IT !!! ( Especially DUBSTEP :P ) :)

Well gday gday how the hell are ya all ! ?

So I couldnt really decide on a them for this post so im just going to write about a whole lotta random shit haha ....first of all HOW FUCKING AWESOME IS MUSIC !!! Im a big fan of music and its a big part of my life as anyone who knew me well would know ;) . My favorite type of music is definetely dubstep, closely followed by drum and bass ;) I also like rock and some indie and some old school grunge\rock like Nirvana , Silverchair, Rage Against The Machine, and even some heavier stuff like KoRn , Slipknot , Mudvayne and System Of A Down :) But seriously nowdays im super into dubstep/drum and bass ;) If you have never heard much dubstep then I will introduce you to some by throwing up a couple of links to my favorite songs ! ;) First of all I will put up a song by a group called Noisia , they are from The Netherlands and they are 3 crazy dudes making some seriously heavy and well produced dubstep/drum and bass style of music , with some glitch tracks mixed into their normal hard hitting type songs :) This song is called Stigma and the film clip is hilarious as they show some of these crazy evangelical christians in America going crazy at church when they are "possesed by god" or whatever the hell they think ....crazy crazy people haha. Here it is!! ENJOY !!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ku0RH36iVog

Ok so I hope you checked that out and had a good laugh haha ...the sound quality isnt the best but its still awesome haha ;) Ok so next song is called Dinosaurs and its by a guy called 16 Bit and its just a crazy crazy ass film clip with some good beats to go behind it ;) Check it out and enjoy the crazyness !!! :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kevdt1T9daA

Ok so next song im going to get you to check out ( if you wanna ) is an old song but its a new remix ;) Your all probably familiar with the Prodigy song called Breathe ... This is remixed here by a group called The Glitch Mob and I have only really disovered The Glitch Mob recently and found this rediculously awesome remix of Breathe ...just when you think this song cant get any dirtier they go and do this to it ;) CHECK IT OUT YO !!! ;)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nixkUITtgPc       ( Excuse the fact that its on Fast and Furious 6...dont hate the player hate the game !! ) :P

Ok and I beleive I will throw you another song and while im at it I may aswel give you my favorite Glitch Mob song and its called Fortune Days and this is the glitch style of music which is sort of like dubstep but just a bit more random and off tempo if that makes any sense haha . Chec it ;)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0YS0cBJzyA

Ok so i figure while im at it I will give you lucky people another song recommendation ( probably only 2 people are even going to read this let alone listen to the songs haha ) But anywho who cares haha , So this last song is by probably my favorite drum and bass producer and he is the one and only SHOCKONE !! ;) He is originally from Perth , Australia,but decided to move to London to be in a better market and environment for producing awesome music .... This song is called polygon and was one of his first songs and its done with his sister on the vocals... really cool ! This song was for along time his most popular but then he broke through when he released his first album called Universes which sold a shitload of things on itunes or watever and was top 5 beatport or something like that haha . Love this song ! :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zAmC-bdkSSE


Ok so now I have done 4 songs I may asewel give you 5 to make some kind of top 5 song thingo haha . Last song is by 2 guys who collaborated on the same track and there names are Datsik and Excision , and they are just fucking insane producers on their own and together they just seriously fuck shit right up ! This song is definetely one of the heaviest dubstep songs I have ever heard ....and I fucking love it haha ! Check it out its called Deviance ;)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8tzAJpT0vw

Ok so there you go thats basically a rough Top 5 dubstep/drum and bass list from me and a little bit about the songs ;) I like of course other type of music and next time I share some songs I will recommend a few from another genre that I like !! Hope you liked the songs as much as I do .... My girlfiend Sara hates them all and fails to even understand how this type of music is actually music " How could anybody seriously like this kind of music " have been her exact words on more than one occasion haha ....dont bother me ...I love it and thats all that matters ;)

That is all , Peace out , Catch ! :)

A picture from the film clip Dinosaurs by 16 Bit .....its one of my favorite clips of all time !!! :) :() :) :) :)

Travelling :) Ever been to Morocco ....??? :)

Hey hey hey all my Moroccan mates how the hell is ya ? Hope you are all pretty damn good ! :)

Ok so I figured I would write a bit about my trip to Morocco with Sara cause it was pretty cool ...and also kinda not so cool haha :P . So the thing is we were actually supposed to go to Brazil over the christmas break and we had been looking forwards to it so much and had the whole thing planned and everything until we arrived at the aiport .... Mr Skelton do you have your visa here ..... I dont need a visa do i? ....yes sir you need a visa .....oh FUCK !!! Still cannot beleive that me or Sara didint check if we needed visas but it turns out Brazil is the only country in South America where I actually need a visa THE ONLY FUCKING ONE !!! I could have gone to Bolivia or Chille or Colombia but not bloody Brazil ...anyways long story short we ended up going to Morocco instead for 2 weeks and it was pretty cool :)

Ok so first of all EVERYONE is trying to rip tourists off in this country and its just stupid that they do that because their economy relies so heavily on the tourist trade ....it really fucking annoys me because they are just stupid in thinking they can treat everyone like a piece of shit and expect them to go back home and tell everyone how amazing it was ....seriously think of the future you stupid people .

Ok so im just gunna rave on for a bit about all the different ways they try and rip you off lol . First thing we did was jump in a taxi and there was a guy yelling at us " YOU NEED TAXI YOU NEED TAXI " and we said yes we do so he showed us to a taxi about 50m away and then demanded we give him some money just for finding the taxi ...then when we got out of the taxi the driver ripped us off with the change ... I knew he was doing it but just couldnt be fucked arguing about 2.5 Euros so I just let it be.
 All of the tours we went on were totally fucking shite , we booked a heap of tours through this one agency and they showed us pictures and explained everything very nicely and it genuinely seemed like they all would be fantastic and a life changing experience almost ....they were not. We went on a "Sahara" tour which involved being driven around by the guides and stopping at all these stupid argan oil shops and pottery places that were obviously run by their friends and they all just push you in and expect you to spend money and there are so many of them its unbeleivable ... rug stores , silverware stores , pottery stores , argan oil places and so on , we only actually ended up spending about 30 minutes on the "Sahara" and it was not the fucking Sahara they just drove right to the very edge of it and then said there you go this is it and then we went on a camel ride for about 10 mins and at the end of course they wanted about 20 Euros EACH for a fucking 10 minute camel ride ...we ended up giving them about 10 Euros all up . The next tour we went on was a camel ride tour which was supposed to be in a nice forest next to a river ....it was not ....they just dropped us off about 20 mins drive out of town with these weird people with camels and then we proceeded to take a camel ride THROUGH SLUMS !!! Seriously there was rubbish piled up everywhere and kids playing soccer on a patch of dirt in amongst all the mess ...I mean it was cool to see a different side of things but not when u paid for it and paid a fair bit of money ...I think this tour cost about 30 Euros each . The last tour was to Marrakech stopping at some town where Jimi Hendrix used to chill out in his day and we stopped there for about 2 hours of course in between getting shuffled off the bus and into these stupid shops of their friends ....in the end Sara and I just refused to go with them and said we will wait here by the bus and we would walk around a little by ourselves . But on this tour we walked through some amazing markets and small alleyways in a really old area of the town and the guide was so shit and boring and monotonous and if you stopped to take a picture of something or look at something he would actually get pissed off ... fucking shit tours .... but it was not all bad and now I will tell you about the good ;)

So we went to Marrakech and it was just freaken AMAZING as we stayed pretty much on the main square of the town which is just a huge melting pot of people and animals and crazy shit going on haha , in the day they have people with monkeys basically throwing the monkeys ( literally ) onto you and trying to get you to take a picture so they can try and rip you off haha and they also did the same with snakes aswel which I did not apprectiate ...one morning I woke up and this guy wanted to put his stupid Moroccan hat on me and I was so hungover and he just wouldnt stop I ended up throwing it on the ground and yelling at this guy and nearly punching him in the face ...glad I didint . But this square was amazing as it was also attached to a huge market with seriously everything you could ever imagine and we spent a lot of time in the souk ( Moroccan market ) barganing with people and no doubt getting ripped off in the process but happy to because it was so much fun and the people were actually nice ....apart from the fact that nearly everyone would drag you into their store ....you get used to that after a while. At night the square basically turns into one huge restuarant as they set up about 100 really small restuarants in the sqaure and cook and serve the food right there in the same place ...one restuarant would probably be the size of an average living room . The atmosphere in these places is amazing with all the smells and the music and the people , we actually ended up sitting next to a couple from Brisbane where im from in Australia on one of the nights which was really random and cool so we had a good chat and then went our ways :)

        Sara and I with some of the snakes in the square ....I was shitting my pants about the cobra haha

One of the best things we did when we were there was to take a horse and carriage ride around Marrakech with this really nice old man who charged us about 20 Euros for a 2 hour tour which was amazing ....he offerered me 100 camels for Sara as a wife but I said it would have to be 500 and then we would have a deal haha . It was so nice to meet someone who was genuinely friendly and didnt try and rip us off so in the end we gave him 30 Euros for being so nice and taking us on a great tour , he was very happy and so were we ....if only the rest of the people in his country would realise that being friendly actually gets you a long way , but unfortunately I dont think this will ever happen and im sure this means that for a lot of people Morocco will be a one time destination ... I have talked to a lot of people about it and they all think the same as me unfortunately :(

Anyways all in all its a nice and very interesting place with a lot of weird and wonderful shit but you just got to be careful of all the people trying to scam you ....there were many other times we did get ripped off or they attempted to rip us off but I just didint want to go on about it for to long . Anyways thats enough rambling thanks for reading it all if you came to here and hopefully I will see you soon with another post in me mega awesome blog yo ;) :P

That is all , Peace out , Catch :)

This whole meal cost about 7 Euros and it tastes as good as it looks !!! Amazingly awesome !!! :) :)

THE WORLD IS FUCKED !!! ....unfortunately :(

Hey hey hey all my fucked up friends how the hell are ya ...ok so your not fucked up but the world we live in is fucked up unfortunately :( But I still hope you are all great !! :)

This is just going to be a general rant about all the fucked up things that im thinking about the world in this present point in time . It all stems from the fact that my good mate Andre who is from Brazil sent me a link on facebook saying i should share the link as the Brazillian people are making a stand against their corrupt government in the lead up to the soccer world cup in Brazil in 2014 . I watched the video and it states that the politicians are actually paying themselves as extra 3 months pay per year !! This means that come December at the end of the year they are getting paid for an extra 3 months which dont actually exsist ....this is just one of many things that is just wrong with the Brazillian government and untold amounts of other governments around the world no doubt . The thing that made me think and also made me very angry is the fact that whilst yes this is a big problem for the people of Brazil and they should stand up to their corrupt and incapable government , the thing that gets me is that there are so many other bigger problems with so many other countries in the world at the moment , with the biggest and most pressing concern being that of Syria . I know i have spoken at length about Syria but the fact is FUCKING NOTHING IS HAPPENING AND PEOPLE ARE STILL DYING EVERYDAY !!!! The western alliance of countries are just deliberating as to whether they should help the "rebels" by supplying them with weapons ....the fact is they already supply them with non lethal aid such as trucks, first aid supplies, food and many other essential items ....but they dont supply them with weapons ...and for good reason because who knows whos hands they will end up in after the war . The problem I have is that pretty much everyone knows WHERE Bashar Al Assad is at any given time so why dont they just tactically bomb the fuck out of his strongholds with American or British or French or any god damn countries rockets ....he is a MURDERER and he is still killing and maiming thousands of innocent men, women and children and the most unbeleivable thing is it still continiues with no sign of stopping . This is all i will say about Syria as i have already expressed my opinions in another one of my posts but i just feel so strongly about it that i think it needs to be talked about more , the more people learn and understand of the atrocities that are happening the better chance that they will be stopped one way or another .

You know it actually embaressing for me to think that i live in such a world where so many things can go wrong with it . There are to many things to list and i could go on for literally days about all of them but another one that i must bring up is America, I dont like America ( not the people but the politicians and the people in charge) My point is that even at the risk of sounding like an insane conspiracy theorist I agree with the millions of people who beleive that the September 9/11 attacks that happened in America where done BY AMERICA!! How can i beleive that you may ask ? Because I dont always accept the what people tell me and I like to seek the truth and I have watched countless documentaries about this very topic , the 2 twin towers were demolished in a controlled demolition ...seriously how the FUCK is a building going to collapse onto itself when there is a fire midway up the structure!!! Think of this as an example, if you saw a tree that was on fire halfway up and was only on fire halfway up its trunk then if it was to fall over you would only assume that the tree will break apart in the middle section and fall off to one side and not collapse onto itself in a way that would not be physically possible , think about it people ....why did the buildings collapse DIRECTLY onto themselves and not fall one way or another and hit other buildings ??? Anyways I could rant on and on about this one topic for about a week because I feel so strongly about this subject and the undeniable truths that so many people choose to ignore through ignorance. I will post up a link here to a documentary about 9/11 and how it was all a big lie , please watch it and then decided for yourself  :) . I dont know the full reasons of why America would do this to themselves and claim so many innocent lives but I can guess and it was just a feeble reason to declare war on the middle east and as such to suppress an uprising in the Islam world which threatened the whole western world in the eyes of America ...im sure the politicians/military advisors that allowed this whole thing to transpire would just think of the thousands of people who died on that day as "collateral damage" . Here is the link where you can check out a very good documentary about 9/11 and see for yourself and make your own opinions :) please watch it even though sometimes its a bit boring it is VERY important in the context of how the world is now and how the world will be in the future :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qq3wPOvhjp8

This is a picture of the hole in the Pentagon with an image of the exact plane that was supposed to have hit the Pentagon superimposed over it ......IT JUST DOENST FUCKING FIT DOES IT !!! Thats obviously a hole not made by a plane !!!!!

Now remember these people are all professionals and are NOT stupid and are providing you with the FACTS about what happened on that fatefull day ... i have watched countless documentaries with highly succsessfull profesionals such as , Professors , Doctors , Engineers , Architects , Politicians and so on and so on ... please people just watch a few of these "conspiracy theory" documentaries and i hope you will also seek the truth such as I have and they have done also :)

That is all , Peace out , Catch

Please share my blog ya'll !!!! :) :) :)

Hey hey hey my very good looking and super intelligent friends I hope you are all swell ;)

Ok so here's the deal ...if you share my blog you automatically become awesome ....like not just as awesome as say Jim Carey was in Dumb and Dumber but as awesome as Will Ferrell in Anchorman/Stepbrothers ...that's how awesome u will become ;)

But seriously I really appreciate all you guys checking out my blog ( theres not heaps of fans but some haha ) but my point is that I would like for more people to check it out and if you share it then the chances of it being seen by a lot more people increase tenfold ...as im sure u are aware ! It actually takes a bit of effort to write a blog , its kinda like having a homework assignment that u have to do at least a few times a week and it takes usually about an hour or so ...and lots of intellectual thinking :P . I have noticed a few people have shared my blog on their facebook page and that's super cool and I thank them shitloads for that but I also noticed that they just posted up the link and didn't actually say something like " this is my idiot mates blog ...hes stupid and immature but somewhat entertaining you should check it out ! " no they just post nothing and think that people will have some kind of telekeneisis ( dunno how to spell that one ) and they will just automatically go there magically .

Im not saying you have to or even that you should share my blog im just saying if you wanna become Will Ferrell in Stepbrothers cool then this will be a good first step ! :P Sorry if it seems a bit egotistical or whatever but unless im mistaken the point of a blog is for people to read it and when I write a new blog and I see that 2 days later only 3 people have looked at what I posted it gets a bit disappointing ! But seriously cheers to all who have taken time to read it and I really apprectiate it ! I even saw today that I have some people from Angola who checked out my blog ...3 of them haha and also Finland !! Giggidy... Cheers all :)

That is all , Peace out , Catch ! :)

  Here is a photo of me showing my appreciation for Louis Vuitton and anyone who likes that shit

Viruses on my laptop = shitty shitty bang SHUTDOWN !! lol

Hey hey hey all my virus infected interweb pals ...you probly just got a virus from looking at my blog that's how infected my computer is haha ! But I hope you don't and I hope your computer/laptop/phone/whatever is free from the scourge that be computer viruses!

Ok so yeah I know your all thinking I got all these viruses from looking at porn but that's not true ...they actually came about through me trying to download some music programs through the pirate torrentz thingo place haha . Which in the end I didn't even use because holy fuck that shit is COMPLICATED !! I mean I would love to make music and I love music and listen to it religiously and talk about it constantly but seriously ...that shit was like giving King Henry V an ipad and telling him to make some "sic ass beatz" ...just aint gunna happen... and it didn't .

Funny thing happened one time was I was on facebook just talking to someone on the chat thing and then Sara screamed accusingly at me "WHO THE FUCK IS HEIDI !!!??? " and she was referring to the scantily glad girl in a pop up chat screen who was saying dirty things to me in Norsk ( which I don't understand ) but anyways the point was that even though I know I have no reason to stress or anything but my heart actually skipped a beat for some reason and for a second my world started to cave into itself lol ....kinda like when im at the airport getting my bag searched by customs ( yeah they love people with big beards :P ) and im fucking sweating and twitching and nervous as hell even though I know %100 that I have nothing illegal or anything else to worry about in my suitcase but for some stupid reason my brain just goes .... nah man remember your an idiot and idiots are capable of any amounts of stupid activity ...for all you know you probably have managed to smuggle a super rare diamondback indian pit viper snake in the secret compartment of your bad accidentaly somehow .... but then the cool feeling of reason flows ever so smoothly over my body caressing my brain into a sense of relief when we finally come to the realization that there is nothing to worry about .... but still that one second of "FUCK IM FUCKED YOUR AN IDIOT STUPID THINGS HAPPEND TO IDIOTS ! " is not a good second.....

                                  This is what my viruses look like ...bad ass MOFOS!!! :P

Also I managed to download a virus protection program that is actually a virus ( only I could do that ) and now its always telling me DLL Virus protection server has located 110 viruses on your system , click fix to restore your computer to safe levels , when I know what actually will happen is that is will open some even bigger and badder virus onto my computer and then probably il be getting charged with starting Wikileaks somehow lol .

Anyways just a note to people ....viruses aren't cool and anyone who tells you they are is a pooface ....yeah I said that ...my blog, my idiocy... AAAAALRIGHTY THEEEN !!! ;)

Ok im out :)

That is all , Peace out , Catch ! :D

In Norway its expensive to wipe your ass !!! ;)

Hey hey hey my rish ass wiping friends how are we all !! :)

Ok so Norway is one of the most expensive countries in the world with Oslo permanently residing in the top 5 most expensive cities in the world ( usually number 2 only to Tokyo ) ...and I live here haha with good reason though as my beautiful girlfriend Sara calls Oslo home ( even though she Is from Karlskrona in Sweden ) and so this is the reason I live here now and I don't mind it :)

Oslo attracts many Swedish workers because of the strong economy and wealth of jobs here ( unemployment I think is %3 ) and its so close to Sweden you would almost be crazy not to come here and cash in in the newfound wealth that has been bestowed upon Norway due to the discovery of  oil in the North Sea .

The first day when I arrived Sara and I went to a café , not a fancy one just a normal average café , and I ordered a biff smorsbrod ( steak sandwich ) and an orange juice and when I calculated it back to Australian dollars is cost about $ 36 ( 200 NOK ) and this is when I just though to myself ...fuck! ...im fucked! ....that's unbelievable! ....I have NEVER paid that much for any meal in my life let alone a fucking steak sandwich!. It takes a while to get used to how overpriced it is here but when you earn Norwegian Krone it seems less expensive ( but still pretty damn expensive haha )

I have worked out that I earn about  %25 more money here than I would back in Australia ....but everything is about %25 more expensive here than it is back home AND I pay %36 tax instead of about %25 back home , so all in all I basically loose about % 11 of my total income whilst enjoying a somewhat small improvement in the quality of life ...sort of haha ( 6 months of winter is definitely no improvement on basically no winter in Brisbane :P )

Sara and I were in a shopping center one day and she needed to use the toilet and when we found it we found that it costs 10 NOK , which is about $1.75 AUD ... that's fucking unbelievable ...this is why when people ask me if its expensive here I tell them that its expensive to wipe your ass here because its true !!

                 Bring your gold bullion ya'll its $1.75 to use the toilet in this place ! :P

All in all im not really trying to complain im basically just telling it how it is , oh and fuck I nearly forgot !! One time I was having a beer with a mate in the main street and it cost me 98 NOK which is about $16.50 AUD ....it was a pint I must admit but fuck me $16.50 FOR A FUCKING PINT !!! Needless to say I have found nearly all the cheap places to drink beer in Oslo, the cheapest ( and possibly the nastiest ) being a place called The Rett Inn Bar which serves pints of local beer for 42 NOK which is about $7 :)

Anyways im going to stop rambling on now I think I got my point across haha , Oslo is still a nice place with nice people and plenty to do ...just make sure you bring you gold bullion to pay for your beers haha ;)

That is all , Peace out , Catch :)

Travelling ! Ever been to Croatia ?? YOU SHOULD GO !! :)

Hey hey hey my international friends Jag hoppas du ar bra ! ( Norsk for I hope you are good :P )

So yeah since getting off my ass in May last year and moving to Norway I had only previously been to New Zealand and Thailand , but now I have been to shitloads of places thanks to living in Europe ...I still find it amazing that approx. 50 countries are all within 3 hours flying ;)

So yeah one of the first places that Sara and I went on holidays was Croatia . To be honest I was a bit skeptical in the beginning as I was actually quite ignorant about Croatia and just thought it was part of the Balkans and didn't actually have such a beautiful coastline ...Sara showed me one picture and I said "FUCK YES WE ARE GOING!!!"

This is a picture of the island called Hvar , my favorite place in Croatia ...you can see why !! :) :)

There are many things to love about this country and the one that surprised me the most was the people ....everyone ( %99 ) of everyone is so friendly and helpful and happy to have you in their beautiful country enjoying what they have to offer . The coastline was absolutely amazing as you can see from the above picture but pictures don't do it justice as they say and its very true in this case ...just imagine buying a beer ( which are super cheap by the way ) and finding a nice place by the water and just sitting back , relaxing and letting all the worlds problems roll away as you enjoy a nice cold beer in beautiful surroundings . One of the best days of my life took place when Sara and I took a small boat to a secluded beach on the island called Hvar and relaxed by the beach all day and then checked out a jazz concert at this tiny bar/café/restaurant/awesome outside seating area right on the beach and we managed to get through about 6 bottles of their homemade wine which was of course cheap and so very nice ... yeah I may have ended up falling down some stairs later that night but it was the stairs fault !!! True story ;)

Its so cheap ! When I went to the supermarket to buy a beer and I found that you could buy a 2 LITRE beer for only around $3 AUD I was amazed ....AND you can drink in public in Croatia ( within reason of course ) If your eating out the absolute most you will pay would be around $ 8-15 AUD depending of course on where you are eating and what you are eating, a local beer will set you back about $2.50 AUD , a nice wood fired pizza at a nice restaurant will set you back about $10 AUD  ...which I find a shitload more appealing than a big mac meal that costs the same , and the service at the restaurants is all pretty damn good, they usually have 4 different menus ... English , Italian , German and Croatian ....this must drive the waitress people crazy having to chop and change languages so often but they really do handle it well with at least one person per restaurant who will speak fluent in either English , Italian or German . Hotels are also cheap and a bit different as a lot of the places you will stay are usually just peoples houses ( they have really big houses haha ) and they just rent out rooms or apartments to holiday makers as they have learned to adjust with the sudden influx of tourists in the past 15 years , it also is cheap and you will find that you can rent a reasonably nice 1 bedroom apartment complete with kitchen and balcony for around $60-80 per night and this is just the apartment so you can sleep more people if you want to be really cheap . :)

If you do go I would highly recommend checking out the islands of Hvar and Brac' as these places are just magnificent and breathtaking , explore , take a walk , or just lie on the amazing beaches , believe me you wont be disappointed .

I am currently planning my next trip to Croatia in August with one of my best mates... yes its a mancation but Sara will be joining us after about 15 days when we travel to Montenegro, which I am very much looking forwards to the more I read about it ! :)

Take my word GO THERE !!

That is all , Peace out , Catch