HOLY TARANTULA VAGINAS IM BACK !

Well, Hey Hey Hey thats right Your favourite Australian from Oslo who blogs and also has Evan as his middle name and one time had to go to the hospital to get sand removed from his eye is back ! With AVENGENCE ! (Think thats how u spell it, got no spell check on Saras Norwegian computer, well there probly is but i dont know how to work it haha, moving right along though). So yeah been like 7 or so months since I have blogged and im sorry about that. My need for blogging comes and goes but hopefully this time it will stick, like heroin addiction ! ;)

So whats news in my life?? (I would ask you whats goin on in your life but nobody ever bloody comments on my blogs so I assume there is no need for me to be asking) Well Sara and I got married for the second time haha, we have already had a wedding a couple of years ago but that was basically for my visa so they wouldnt send me back home to Australia, which actually wouldnt have been so bad really considering a week or so ago here in Oslo it was fucking -20 degrees !!! MINUS FUCKING 20! We also bought and apartment here in Oslo in November ( I think thats when we moved in lol) so we are both bloody happy about that ! We managed to get a really good price because a mate of mine was actually selling the property ;) Oh Yeah ! Giddy up indeed !!! Other than the wedding and the apartment buying just kinda been doing the usual shit, travelling, drinking beers, hanging out with friends, oh I got a free snowboard but thats for another post, and other than that just getting older, uglier and wiser ! ;)

So i figured I would get back into blogging by telling u guys a bit about my wedding ! It was really fucking EPDAWG ! (for those that are new to my blog epdawg is a word me and my friend Rob made up, its a combination between epic and dawg if you didnt figure that one out for yourself) We actually got married in Thailand on Koh Samui island where we first met nearly five years ago now. It was great, we came in on a motherflippin elephant and the wedding was on the beach which was great ! I had shorts and no shoes on so i was happy as fuck haha ! So yeah the wedding was great, the sunset was great, the speeches were bloody great (mine of course being oscare worthy) the whole evening was just bloody awesome ! I will show ya a few photos now and give a little explanation for all of them ! :)

Ok so this first one is of us arriving at the venue at the beach on our bloody elephatnt ! How freaken epic does it look hey, you know why it looks epic? Beacause it really was ! First and possibly last time I will ever go on an elephant ! :)

This second photo is of us holding the wedding certificate, and I must say we both look pretty damn hot if I do say so myself haha :P

This next photo is of us walking back down the isle as a married couple, there was bloody heaps of flower petals getting thrown around, was really nice though ! :)

This next shot is just of the wedding party on the beach in the shape of a heart, oh its so nice and romantic isnt it ;) One of the best things about getting married in Thailand on the island we first met was that everybody says oh thats so nice and romantic, and it kinda is, the best part is that I didnt actually have to do anything to be romantic haha, just get married in a bloody great country with great people ! :)

This next one is of Sara and her two bridesmaids, doesnt she look beautiful, of course because I wouldnt settle for anything less! She looked beautiful and i knew she would, best thing about Sara is that she is that beatiful on the inside too ! (Its corny but its true haha)

This is just one of the 345,000 photos we took with the professional photographer on the beach after the wedding, just look at that god damn sunset, you can also make out a few more islands off in the distance, god damn epic place to get married ! We were just lucky there was no rain because in the days before the wedding there usually was a tropical storm about the time the wedding was supposed to start so we were lucky with that ! :)

This next photo is just of (from left to right). My best man Johan , my dad Keith, me of course (without me bloody beard mind you !!) and Johans mate Robin (yes thats a mans name in Scandanavia). This was early in the night so we werent to drunk yet, many many people got pretty smashed haha, I wont name names but they know who they are and to be honest it just added to the atmosphere and who whole evening! ;) EPDAWG INDEED !

Last of all this is a photo of Sara and I just as we finished our wedding dance (which we took three dance classes to learn and im happy to say we pretty much smashed it) We even ended with a kiss at the exact time the fireworks went off ! How bloody epic is that ! :)

We also did heaps of other cool shit while we were in Thailand and honeymooning in Cambodia, not least eating scorpions and tarantulas (vaginas and all). So next blog I will tell you guys a bit more about what we got up to for the rest of the trip cause god damn its epic in that part of the world, when you can get a draught beer for $0.50 on the beach in a cold glass you really cant loose can you haha, until then keep it real, glad to be back and I hope you guys ( the 5 People who read my blog) are happy too ! I will DEFINITELY keep it up more often this time !

That is all, Peace out, Catch ;)

Holy camel testicles Angela Merkel I just went past 12,000 views !!! :)

Hey hey hey all my loving and adoring fans ! Hope your all bloody great !
So yeah I just went past 12,000 page views for my blog !! :) . Whilst I am definitely not breaking any records or winning any awards I still think its pretty fucking epdawg !

Not really sure who reads my blog or if just a handfull of people read it and a shitload of other people get lost on the internet or possibly someone takes a lot of drugs and gets stuck in a constant loop of reloading my page constantly for hours upon hours... either way whatever it is I just wanted to say cheers (Australian for thanks) to the people who do read it. There are a few I know and a few that I have met through my blog and it makes me happy as fuck to know all my stupid ramblings are being read by people ... hopefully being appreciated aswell haha.

This is the list of the top places that have viewed my blog and how many views per country there is :) Kinda cool ! I know people obviously in Norway, Sweden, Australia and the United Kingdom but dont know anyone from those other countries. Which again is cool as fuck that people are reading my blog from all over the world. Even just this week people have read my blog from such random places as Mexico, India , Austria, Netherlands and Tanzania ... Tanzafuckingnia !! Pretty sweet! Just happy as fuck to be able to express my opinions and views and feelings about the world we live in.

Norway	3008
United States	2230
Australia	1551
United Kingdom	564
Sweden	524
France	398
Russia	378
Ukraine	369
Germany	316
Latvia	137

Anyways just a quick blog to say cheers and of course keep checking in every now and then to see what more stupid/crazy/informative and generally awesome things I have written on the interweb. You know now if you type Aussie in Oslo or even Australian in Oslo in Google my blog will come up first ! :). Kinda cool I reckon ! :) Cheers again and now i will reward you with some stupid but fucking hilarious meme I found on the internet today haha. Keep it real... like this kid !!
That is all , Peace out , Catch ;)

Cant think of anything to blog so heres some of my favorite pictures from me FB ;) :D

Yo yo yo whats going down all my bitches and niggas ( probly shouldnt say niggas but hey if people complain I will just put that down to good publicity , they do say any puiblicity is good publicity ) Aaaaaaanyways just having a good old scroll through all my old facebook photos and figured I can fill up a post with putting my favorite pictures in here haha . Lazy but effective is how I would describe this post . Anyways here we go ;)

First picture is just of me and Sara ( my better half ) without Sarez (as she hates to be called MUHAHAHA) I wouldnt be the person I am today . She is the love of my life and all that other crap . Shes hot and shes Swedish to which of course is a bonus ;)

The second picture is of me and Sarez holding some snakes in Morocco infront of a cobra - which I was fucking shitting myself of because the cobra was only about 2 metres away haha.

This third picture is of me next to a log cabin in Saras home town of Karlskrona (Sweden) I figured since my blog is called Aussie in Oslo I should show some winter pictures considering its basically winter here for fucking 6 months of the year !!

The fourth picture is of me standing next to a moose on some "moose safari" that Sarez and I did in Sweden . It was basically a huge pen where there were moose and you just walked around it ...kinda boring but kinda cool in a way because I had never seen a live moose ... they are actually pretty fucking big haha. Funny as I told Sarez that when she came to Australia we went diving with great white sharks that were 5 meters long (in a cage of course) and when I come to Sweden we go on a bloody moose safari haha :P

This fifth picture if of my family ... well some of them anyways as I have a fucken big family haha. On the left is my sister Zadeena , then of course me , then my dad Keith dressed as Shrek and my stepmum Kim as Shreks wife (or whatever) and then my sister Teags . Family is awesome and I miss mine heaps cause I have the best family in the history of everything haha ;)

The sixth picture is of me and a mate fishing on the Pottsville river . Pottsville is about 2.5 hours drive from Brisbane and me and my mates used to go their camping at least every month ... it is my favorite place in the world ... there isnt even a close second . So many good memories ... and not a phone in sight haha ;)

The seventh picture is of me doing a "FULLY SICK BURNOUT BRO!" in my old ute in the middle of the Aussie outback when Sarez and I were on a massive roadtrip . Man I miss the hugeness of Australia haha ... Did you know you can fit 17 Swedens in Australia .. true fact yo ;)

The eight picture is of a koala Sarez and me came across on the side of the road in Australia when we were on our road trip , Sarez even got to pat it a little bit which was freaken super rare , I have seen many koalas in my time but they are always up in the trees so she was bloody lucky to get this opportunity on her first trip to Australia .

The Ninth Picture is of me standing in a field of rapeseed in Sweden ... I kinda look like a rapist in this photo so its kinda fitting haha :P

The tenth and last picture is of a small fish Sarez caught- (on her first bloody cast! Look how amazed she looks haha) at Pottsville , my two favorite things in the world all in one . Sarez and Pottsville ... if only I could convince Sarez to move to Pottsville ¨with me then my life would be Complete ! :D Sorry this post was a bit lazy but hey all I can think about right now seems to be how stupid people are so I figured I needed to seprate my rants with some normality. Keep it real gangsters !

That is all , Peace out , Catch ;)

Holy shit havent blogged in nearly a month ....sorry mates !

Yo yo yo, how the hell is all my intraweb mates !? . Sorry I havent blogged in a while I have been quite busy being a bit lazy.  I love having a blog but sometimes writing a blog is a bit annoying ... its like that assignment that u keep putting off until the last minute, except with a blog there is no time limit so sometimes it goes for nearly a month haha . Anyways to be honest I have not had that much to blog about lately unless you want me to continue telling you how much I hate Tony Abbot ... but I reckon I have done that enough .

So over easter Sara and I went to visit her parents in Karlskrona in Sweden and it was pretty damn good :) Her parents really are starting to turn into real In-Laws and its kinda awesome because even though I dont see my parents often (at all really) they are becoming my adopted parents and bloody great ones at that ... her dad doesnt mind a beer or two and a snifter of whisky and her mum is one of the nicest and happiest people you will ever meet and both are easy to get along with and also speak very good English which I was kinda surprised by but its a bloody good surprise ;) Anyways heres a couple of pics from our time there. -The weather was so freaken awesome ! :D

All these pictures are from around Saras home town of Karlskrona which is a relatively small town of 50,000 people in the very South East of Sweden :) really nice place ...when the weather is good ;)

 

 

 

 

 

Other than easter not to much has happened really ... thats kinda why I havent blogged haha , aaaaanyways no doubt I will think of something else to blog about soon, I wanna blog all the time about many things like how much stupid shit Tony Abbot is doing and how teenagers should have electric shocks fitted to their  iPhones if they use them to much and how social media\internet is absolutely destroying the world ... problem is I have already blogged about ALL that stuff haha .... maybe I will just blog about it again but say it a little differently and pretend its new and exciting .....aaaaaanyways until then I will say goodbye . Goodbye .

 

That is all , Peace out , Catch

 

BUT WAIT THERES STILL MORE !!!!

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8zronW6HcmU - This is a BONUS link and its of a mate (kinda) of mine from back home in Brisvegas, anyways he is talented as fuck and makes this whole song with only his voice as he does with all his music ... hes called Tom Thum and hes fucken epic! Check it !

On my birthday we checked out some viking graves and ruined castles ... ya dont get that shit back home in Australia !!

Hey hey hey all my well travelled friends , how fucking good is it to live in Europe ! The other day I was in Sweden AND Denmark then the next day in Germany ... frickin awesome I tells ya ;)

So yeah when we were in Sweden on my birthday I decided that we should borrow Sara`s parents car and do a small road trip around South Sweden.. mainly around Karlskrona where Sara is from. I wanted to go look at these old ruined castles and viking graves because that shit is bloody awesome and pretty much ALL Australians love all that shit because as you know we dont really have much history in our country ... other than we invaded it in 1780 and havent left since ... so to see ruined castles from the 16th and 15th century is always cool ! But the more I think about it the more paranoid I start to get that im getting old... but hey if getting old means travelling around and seeing bloody awesome old things then bring it on ! Anyways here is a couple of pictures from the day , the first one is of the viking graves which was super cool , and also makes me feel somewhat connected to them because actually I had relatives in Sweden in the 1850`s-1890`s so in my head im always thinking that maybe back in the day my heritage came from the vikings ;) I hope so anyways ! Possibly this is the grave of my ancestors... possibly ;)

 

 



 

This second photo is of some ruined Castle built by the Danish when they ruled the South of Sweden around 1600 ... not much to see really but you could just feel the history that went down there ... bloody awesome I say ! ;)

 

 

 

This Third Picture is of Sara climbing over some really shitty fence ladder thingo to walk through some muddy fields to try and find this ruined castle haha ... she hates this photo so being the asshole I am I figured I would post it up on the whole intraweb for everyone to see ! Love ya Sarez ! ;) :P

 

 

This last photo im just going to put up because I think its funny and I also dont want to start another topic on this post cause then it will be too long ;) This is my impression of a gay Riddick ! ;) :P

 

 

That is all, Peace out, Catch ;) 







G`day G`day everyone :) HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!! :) IM BACK ! ;)

Hey hey hey all my 2014 intraweb mates I hope your 2014 will be the best year ever ! :) Much love and peace to everyone and I hope that you can bring love and peace to your loved ones :)

So yeah been a bit slack recently having holidays and then getting back to reality (which sucks balls mind you) But now im back and ready for a great 2014 blogging (and some other shit) ... my plan is to get to a stage where I have 12 million views per day :P ...then if you use the blog money making calculator then I can probly make around $25 AUD per day which is enough for food ... seriously why do they even offer to pay you for blogging when in reality (where MOST of us live) you cant make fuck all money and really the only people who will actually make money are already famous people who are already rich (how most of the world Works) .... ah fuck!!! ... ahwel lucky I do it because it gives me a great sense of satisfaction to spread all the bullshit I like to talk around the world haha. Cheers for listening motherfuckers ! ;)

So how was everyones new years\Christmas\holidays ? (rhetorical question haha) Mine was damn good, thanks for asking ;). So we were off to Malmø in Sweden for a weekend and then off to Karlskrona where Sara is from in Sweden and we stayed there at her parents place for a week ... which was ok ...I say ok because a week is a long time to spend with anyone really haha ... but her parents are cool so its all good, although her dads super dry sense of humour sometimes becomes a bit much , but luckily I know them so well now I dont have to laugh at all his jokes because now im comfortable around him haha ... sometimes his jokes are funny but a lot of times they are just bad haha. Anyways the coolest thing we did when we where there was go to an ice hockey game and fuck me it was AWESOME ! We could only manage to get standing "seats" in the area where all the fans where and it was crazy.. there was a small fight in the first minute and shit was going on all the time ! The one shit thing was that the local team Karlskrona had not lost a home game in 15 games and then of course the first game I go to they lost like 8-6 I think was the end score. I have been to a LOT of sporting events in my time ( Soccer, Rugby Union , Rugby League , AFL , cricket , baseball, swimming ) and I would say that ice hockey is one of the most exciting ! Shit was going on all the time and even though most of the time I had no idea what was going on it was still fucking EPDAWG ! Here is a photo from the game that I took :)

Then after that we were off to Berlin and hot damn it was pretty damn good ! Its a shame it was winter because im sure its a much better place in the summer, as are most places in Europe in the winter,  but still it was a great 4 nights we had there including new years night which was great , although we didnt make it to the main square where there was ONE MILLION People ... and im glad we didnt haha, fuck that ... I get huge anxiety when there are 1000 People in a small area let alone one MILLION ;) Anyways seeing the Berlin wall was probly my highlight because of the amazing art on the wall itself , I wanted to see so much more but the people I was with had seen enough ... that really sucked balls but when your with a goup of 4 ppl and you are only one person you can only make so much of the decisions haha , owel , anyways here is a picture of me and Sara kissing infront of one of the most iconic sections of the wall ;) haha

 

Figured I would throw in another Picture of Berlin since it was so cool with all this old building etc, it
was actually really surprising how much survived World War 2. Not sure what this building is called but I call it the dome building with some gold thing on top .... thats the Scientific description that is ! ;)

Anyways there was a few other Things that we did on Our trip including a terrible trip to the disgustingly inhumane Berlin "Zoo" and also a small road trip around South Sweden on my birthday. But I get to that in a later post ;)

That is all, Peace out, Catch ;)