Getting on a packed bus kills my soul...

Hey hey hey all my city dwelling mates I hope your city isnt as busy as Oslo because Oslo is a bloody busy place. ( it is also a place where ppl keep to themselves way way way to much )

Today I got on the bus and there was probly about 734 other people on the bus and fuck me not only does it make me somewhat anxious and claustrophobic but it just reminds me that we are all just like sheep herded into a pen and then let off where we live. It really actually makes me depressed a bit because it reminds me of how I live my life. I WISH I lived in the country near a lake and I had some cows and a goat or even near the beach ... oh fuck that would be awesome ... pretty sure im just gunna just MAKE Sara move to Australia eventually because seriously I was thinking about it today and without a word of a lie there are only 4 good months here in Oslo , May-August ... the rest its either really fucking extremely cold or just pretty damn cold and raining and thats just bloody depressing.

Anyways back to the bus , there was this little guy , close to a midget but not actually a midget , but he had a bag as big as him on his back and he decided what a great idea it would be to read his magazine on the bus STANDING UP WITH 54 OTHER PEOPLE ....seriously what a fuckface , people amaze me sometimes ... no , all the time , but unfortunately its not really good things , for the most its just fucking stupid shit like that. So many people in this world think they are the only people in the world , but some people I see make me happy. There was a guy on the subway last night who was just singing and getting down to his music and he was so happy and he smiled at me and I smiled at him and it made me feel better about the world (kinda gay I know haha) , most people thought it was annoying and were looking at him kinda angry ... fuck them!

This reminds me of a time when I was on the subway here in Oslo and there was this homeless guy who managed to bring a whole box full of old rubbish onto the train and he dug in there and found an old used yogurt cup and he proceeded to squash it into his face and lick the nasty looking old yogurt that was still in there and it was fucking HILARIOUS ! Problem was I looked around at everybody else and if they werent to busy glued to their stupid phones they were just ignoring this guy , I just burst out laughing out loud and wondered why nobody else was. Nobody else was because Norway is such a fucking reserved place to live ... in Australia someone would have said something funny or at least many people would be laughing , no no , not Norway , people just keep to themselves and pretend like they cant see the smelly hobo sucking on an old yogurt cup hahahahaha fuck it still makes me smile when I think about it. So all in all remember to be happy and interact with other people in society because not only will it make you feel happier it makes other people feel happy and surely thats worth something ! :)

That is all , Peace out , Catch ;)

It really fucken amazes me what people read most on my blog....

Hey hey hey all my materialistic mates (I hope not all haha) I hope that I can think of more things to talk about that are just absolute shit.

So I always see what the most viewed posts I write are and usually they are the few ones that I talk about things like facebook, candy crush and bitstrips, they are by far the most viewed posts and it really dissapoints me because when I talk about important things like politics or saving the environment etc basically NOBODY reads the posts. The most recent example is when I posted about saving the great barrier reef and there was only 10 views of that particular post but when I posted about candy crush the other day I had 42 views .... WAT . THE . FUCK. So from what I can gather from this information is that people care more about candy crush than they do one of the natural wonders of the world and this makes me sick ... it also makes me want to stop writing my blog because it really doesnt seem to be getting to the right people... and that makes me sad :( Anyways it just makes me wonder what kind of people read my blog ... is it all 15 year old girls or what the fuck ? Anyways I hope that some people are reading who are not as materialistic as most people are nowadays and that there is hope for the future haha.

 Collect friends and experiences and stories , not fucking ipads and the newest phones or the newest shoes, LIVE YOUR LIFE DONT WASTE IT ON SHIT!!!

That is all , Peace out , Catch

I LOVE to hate Tony Abbot ... and im not alone !!

Hey hey hey all my politically savy mates I hope your ready for some Abbot bashing because that is whats coming your way.

So Tony Abbot is the prime minister of Australia and he also manages to be one of the biggest dicks in the world (how he finds the time for both I dont know) ... but he does .... he has only been prime minister since September last year and he has already shown that all he cares about is his capitalist friends and making them more money- People such as - Clive Palmer , Gina Rineheart and many others who just care about profit and not the environment or the well being of the average Aussie. There are to many things to list in relation to all the bullshit policies that Mr Abbot has implimented but hes decided to fuck some more shit up ...

In Tasmania there are many beautiful rainforests with huge 100m+ tall trees that have been around for hundreds and thousands of years and you know what Tony Abbot says ...his Words - "there is to much forest "locked up" in Tasmania" and you know what his great plan is ... to chop it all down to help the logging industry and therefore take care of only the ecomony and not the environment ... he says that hes protecting the forestry workers of Tasmania but this is just fucking bullshit because its UNSUSTAINABLE and whats going to happen in 30 years when all the trees are gone and they have to wait hudreds of years for them to regrow. The way the world is going nowdays scares me because people ALWAYS just think about today or tomorrow or 5 years from now ... never 20 years from now and certainly not 100 years from now. Not only does he want to log these beautiful forests he actually wants the forest declassified as World Heritage Listed so he can then log them .... Anyways im happy to report that the Australian public has already had ennough of him and are quickly learning that he only cares about one thing and thats not the people, its the bank accounts of all his good mates. It makes me sick when I hear him speak , he reminds me of George W. Bush when he was president of America ... just a bumbling idiot who reads off cards and does what hes told. Spineless and totally ignorant to the voice of the people of his country, and it makes me happy to know that people are seeing through his lies and deception on so many issues. The new policy regarding "boat People" (immigrant`s\refugges arriving by boat) is just rediculous and pretty much illegal in international law, but thats another story for another time. ;) Please share the word about this stupid stupid man and hopefully we can get him out before he ruins Australia beyond repair :(

That is all ,Peace out , Catch

Candy crush is the most useless thing EVER !!!! STOP IT !

Hey hey hey all my candy crush mates I hope your getting many crushes or watever the fuck you need in that retarded game.

The other day I was on the subway here in Oslo and of course everyone is staring at their phones but im always seeing People (sometimes old people even) playing this stupid retarded candy crush game ... IT IS STUPID! Does anyone remember tetris ? THATS WHAT IT IS JUST WITH STUPID CANDYS AND BULLSHIT !!! Nobody Plays Tetris anymore ... why is this a thing ???
I just fail to understand the reason people play it ... imagine if instead of playing it all the people were reading world news and actually LEARNING about this epdawg planet we live in. In 50 years from now kids will be asking their grandparents "grandma when was the world war 2 started and why?" and they will have no fucking idea but if you ask them to beat Level 435 on candy crush they will be able to do that no fucking worries mate ! What a sick thing and the most fucked up this is that it wont even surprise me when this happens because im pretty damn sure it will! Stop fucking playing all these mindless games on your phones and use your phones to read world news or write a long email to a loved one like ur grandma you never speak to or an old friend you havent heard from in years ... stop wasting your life playing this stupid game !!! PLEASE !! :) It is an affliction of the worst kind! YOU GAIN NOTHING FROM PLAYING THIS GAME!!! STOP IT PLEASE!!!

That is all , Peace out , Catch

Thanks for reading c#nts !!! Please share and tell your mum about this blog! ;)

Hey hey hey all my 13 fans (possibly less) but I just wanted to say cheers to all the ppl who read all the shit I post :)

What would be really mega awesome is if you could share my blog on your Facebook page :) You can also add me on Facebook (just say ur a fan of my blog) and then u can see the shit I post almost daily , if that takes your fancy that is ;-). The thing is that yes ok I don't post as often as some might like but I think quality is better than quantity and my posts are usually pretty long and sometimes informative ;) Anyways I'm trying to post at least 2 times per week so whilst u don't need to be checking everyday u can just catch up once a week or some shit. You can easily find the blog on google if you just search Aussie in Oslo and it's at the top ! Kinda makes me feel like the most famous Aussie in Oslo haha , could be , there ain't many of is here, a few... Anyways just wanted to say thanks and would love if you could spread the word about my blog because that's your way of showing thanks! Cheers c#nts

That is all, Peace out, Catch.

Just saw this photo and thought it was funny so I share it with my billions of fans! (Probly the baby of a co-worker of mine) haha

Why the fuck ppl gotta be so serious/angry ?

Hey hey hey all my glum faced mates I hope ur workplace is a bit more enjoyable than mine ;)

So yeah I got a new job (awesome) and it's painting/plastering on a construction site here in Oslo and that's cool cause I like construction sites and having a job, but I tell ya what's not fun .... Nearly everybody there ... There are people from everywhere , Poland , Slovakia , Bulgaria , Kosovo , Macedonia. That's kind of the problem , there are mainly only immigrant workers and to be honest most of these guys are just angry cunts, I have been working with these painters and there are 5 of them and only 2 of them have said hello and introduced themselves ....what the fucking fuck !!!. In Australia I would already be mates with some guys and have had some good conversations ... Not here ... a few of the guys are cool and happy and friendly but most of them just walk around looking as angry as fuck, so angry I wouldn't be surprised if they just grabbed a hammer and started smashing me in the head. It's fucked up ! They need to take a leaf outta this sloths life and chill the fuck out.

What's more fucked is that it effects my actual mentality because it's been proven that if ur around happy ppl u are happier and vice versa so it's bloody shit ... anyways don't wanna complain to much cause it's just good to have work but fuck me some ppl are miserable cunts. Also ok it doesn't help that we don't really speak the same language (only 2 out of about 15 ppl I met speak English) but hey ur not gunna die if u just say hello or even ask a question in Norsk (which I will usually understand if it's a easy question) but it seems that these angry ppl are content with being angry and will continue this way until they end up in their angry grave with people looking super angry at their funeral. The motto is I think = It's nice to be alive!!!  ... I have a song on my playlist called "it's nice to be alive" by a Brissy band called - Ball park music, and it's such a bloody good song, makes any shitty day fucken awesome ... If any of these guys knew I loved it they probly would take a hammer to my head haha. Anyways take it easy and be as happy as possible ... But not to happy .... Nobody likes a Ned Flanders ;-)

That is all, Peace out, Catch ;)

2 Years ago Sara and I did a massive 6000klm road trip around Australia ... it was freaken epdawg! :D

Hey hey hey all my world travelled friends I hope that one day you are lucky enough to do an epic road trip like we did :)

So this was the first time I met with Sara after meeting her in Thailand 9 months earlier ;). We met in Thailand at the end of my 4 week trip and spent only 2 nights together but thanks to Facebook we stayed in contact then through phone and then skype. She arrived and then we set off on a road trip of a lifetime ...6000 klms from Brisbane all the way down the east coast through Newcastle , Sydney , Melbourne , Geelong , Adelaide, then we travelled back through Central South Australia and New South Wales stopping at places like Wilcania and Broken Hill. It really opened my eyes up to how big and awesome our contry really is ... at one point I measured a road that went for 50klms without a corner ... not even a small deviation 50 KILOMETRES !!! ;) Anyways it was a while back now (January 2012) But its still one of the best memories I have because its where I began to love my now wife and also enriched my already huge love for my home country , Australia.

Instead of telling a massive story in words I have decided to just post up a heap of pics because you know what they say , a picture paints a thousand words and its true !! Man what a trip !!

Here is a photo of Sara holding a koala at the Brisbane Koala Park :) She was so happy as you can see hahaha :D

 

 

This is a picture of a fish that Sara caught when we went camping at Pottsville ( my favorite Place in the world to camp) She caught it on the second cast and thought it was the best thing ever haha :P look at the bewilderment on her face hahaha

 

 

 

How can you not want to spend hours here on this sandy riverbank fishing, drinking beer and talking shit !!

 

 

 

 

Picture of the Sydney opera house from a ferry we were on ... looks great in the photo but even better in person ! Made from Swedish tiles also if you didnt know ;)

 

 

 

Yeah in Melbourne we went on a helicoptor tour of the city ... epxensive but well worth it ... first time in a helicopter and felt really safe ! :)

 

 

 

Now if you ask Sara about the best moment in her life she might say marrying me or she might also say finding this koala on the side of the road in Victoria haha ... she even got to go up and pat him which is extremely rare ... I had never done it in the wild and I AM Australian haha ;)

 

 

 

Sara and I at the 12 apostles along the great Ocean road in Victoria , what a great Place!

 

 

 

Probably my favorite thing about the trip was finding these old farmhouses that are long abandoned and then going into them and exploring them and thinking about the olden days ... I like that kinda shit ! ;)

 

 

We checked out some cool Caves in South Australia ... but much to Sara`s dissapointment didnt have any time to check out one of the world famous wineries around that area...Ì am pretty sure anyone who likes wine even a little bit has had some wine from South Australia ;)

 

 

Because Sara had never been to Australia she loved all the wildlife signs so we had to stop at all the different ones to take a Picture ... this one is for a koala ;)

 

 

 



This is around the area where I timed a road that went for 50 kilometres With no corner!! You can see why haha , not much out here ;)

 

 

This is me doing an awesome burnout in the dirt out in the outback... ;)

 

 

 

This is a beach at Port Lincoln where Sara and I travelled to swim with the great white sharks :) I also have a whole post dedicated to our swim with the sharks ;) Was freaken epdawg to say the least!

 

 

 

Rockin out in Peterborough ...wherever the hell that is ... cant remember haha ;)

 

 

 

We stopped at this super small town called Cockburn (hehe) and they would only give me enough fuel to get to Broken Hill because they had to get their fuel in by driving it in barrels from Broken Hill haha super small town ... look at the 2nd photo ... thats the Whole town !!! ;)

 

 

This Picture is of the hotel\pub where we stayed in Broken Hill ... we arrived on a Sunday at around 5pm and found a room in this pub and had a great night getting drunk playing pool and pissing of the locals by playing Abba from the dukebox hahaha it was a freaken great night !!! :)

 

 

 

This last picture is of the toilet door for the ladies toilets in the Ettamogah pub which is halfway to the Sunshine coast from Brisbane ... if you drive the other way from Brisbane you come to the Gold Coast ... why the fuck am I living in Norway when I come from a place where you can drive for an hour one way and be at the Gold Coast and one hour the other way and be at the Sunshine coast ... seriously .... I dont really know ... damn I miss home ... the things you do for love ay ;)

 

 

 

I hope that gives people a better idea of what Australia is really like... my dream is to one day drive around Australia over 3 months ... we did 6000 klms in 3 weeks and to og around Aus is 22,000 klms so 3 months should be all good !! Just gotta keep dreaming :)

 

That is all , Peace out , Catch